Frequently Offended Questions
Did the government actually cancel your license plate over your last name?
Yes. And here's the part that really stings; they approved it first. The Texas DMV looked at my last name, said "sure, that's fine," put it on a plate, and I drove around with HOES on my truck for two solid years. Two years of nobody caring. Two years of it just being a license plate with my Dutch surname on it. Then one person, one, decided they were offended enough to file a complaint, and just like that, the state of Texas canceled my entire family's last name. I have the letter. It's on the Our Story page.
Is your name family friendly?
Topgolf wouldn't let me finish creating a membership account because my last name triggered their family-friendly content filter. This is a place where you drink and hit things. Apparently Hoes is where they draw the line.
Where my Hoes at?
Most offices just kind of pause before calling our name; you can see it on their face, then they switch from calling last names to calling our first name. But one nurse didn't miss a beat. She just leaned out and yelled "WHERE MY HOES AT?" across a full waiting room. I have nothing but respect for that woman.
Did you give your kids different last names?
Someone actually asked me that once. No, we didn't. They're Hoeses. They'll be fine. Probably.
Where's your happy place?
We showed up to Disney World in matching family shirts, Smokin' Hoes Bar-B-Que , and security walked up to have a conversation about our shirts. The whole family. At the happiest place on earth. We made it in eventually.